des ours dans les jambes (chad)

Date d'inscription : 12/06/2017

22 avril 2017, 16:45

tu commençais à t'envoler doucement dans tes pensées, à chambouler les décors du théâtre de ta tête, à déchirer les grands rideaux rouges qui te servaient de liquide cérébro-spinal. tu fermais les yeux et perçais tes paupières pour voir tout ce que tu ne pouvais pas voir en ayant les yeux clos. tu laissais la nature autour te dire des mots feuillus, des mots mouillés, des mots de branche, des mots venteux. t'essayais de comprendre ce que ce disaient les arbres entre eux. ils parlaient des nuages, ils les accusaient, c'étaient des voleurs.

clouds are just thieves. see, they steel our wind and dance with it like a broken wing.
and they blow words that don't even make sense. it's just some squeaky groans.
and the puff of their cigarettes make us fall. they make the earth turn around and look only at the sun.
and they make big waves that gobble up the world.

tu pensais qu'ils avaient tord d'accuser les nuages. toi, tu trouvais qu'ils avaient l'air plus confortables que les épines des sapins. mais tu ne voulais pas les contredire, t'avais peur des arbres, ils étaient plus grands que toi, on aurait dit des géants. alors tu te relèves, tu tournes sur toi-même et tu commences à courir dans une direction. tu ne savais pas laquelle, mais tu voulais aller dans les bois qui entouraient les bus. mais à la place de t'engouffrer à travers les troncs des arbres, tu fonces en plein dans quelqu'un d'autre. tu te retrouves presque par terre, le mec devant toi aussi. « shit, i'm so sorry! »

Date d'inscription : 12/06/2017

The story is always the same. Always... Like in Disney's movies. You know. A prince. A princess. And a happy end. Trees are always green and beautiful, with nice-smelling flowers. Rivers are so pure that you could drown your conscience in it, and make for sure the devil jealous for letting this beautiful soul vanish in the air.

You just let Ocean city behind, to discover new horizons. And maybe new people. You knew that some joined during this step but you didn't even meet. Like if 42 people was too much to see them all in one single day ! Crazy stupid thing... But the fact is that you were so busy, and you didn't want to say an expeditious hello with no conversation. Anyhow you would have no more than six months to meet people. And loose some other. Leavers... travellers... Who knows if the one you just met won't leave sone days later ? Who knows... Maybe you are the next one on the fucking God's list. The next leaver. No courage. No will to face unexpected events. Who knows ?

You just left your life so many miles away... and now... you wanted to have a face-to-face rendez-vous with mountains. The sun was hiding behind some heavy clouds. The rain should not be so far. You took a deep breath of the the wet soil's smell : indication that a storm happened, probably the night before. You closed your eyes, letting the sun light heat your skin, avoiding the tree's shadows.

And it suddenly hurt. Someone just hit your back. You turned around, starring at the girl. Her face reminded you someone. You probably met her on the beach. She apologised. Nevermind... You tried to remember her name. no way... Are you ok ? you asked, as she just faced you with a fucking nice high speed. Can I ask you what you are fleeing ? It seems to be dangerous... Shall I run too ? and you laughed.

Date d'inscription : 12/06/2017

the trees were the angriest creatures. they swung between the winds, spitting awful things to them. they looked like a bunch of capricious gods. you didn't trust them. neither did you trusted the monster that you thought lived within the woods' darkness. it was a weird tentacled wolf, or a serial killer who was in love with a ghostly squirrel. you didn't know who the hell could possibly fall in love with a squirrel, but for a split second, it seemed to be ok in the world your head was building. « yeah, i'm okay. you? » the face seemed familiar. you saw it on the beach some days ago. it was the face that reminded you of the color of the seas. it wasn't a cold blue. it was a soft and warm blue. a blue some angel was singing. because it seemed to you that angels could sing colors.

« you can run if you want to » you watched him and the trees around you, the leaves that covered the ground and the flowers that started blooming. « i guess there's always something to run away from... » you started walking, then, leaving him behind, to let him decide whether or not he wanted to join you. « what do you say we run away together from the gigantic monster that lives right under this rock? » you point to the ground, where a small rock smiles. it has no mouth, no eyes, nothing but a blank surface. but it seems to you that it smiles. everything seems to smile, even you. you turn towards the guy you bumped into. « i don't think you ever told me what your name was the other day at the barbecue » you're as curious as a child during christmas eve. you suddenly want to know everything. were the trees right about the clouds? were the clouds angrier than the trees? was the enamored serial killer really in love? or was he just pretending, so that he could get close and kill? you pondered, looking at your toes, lost in your thoughts.

Date d'inscription : 12/06/2017

Life is like a watermelon : it seems good but sometimes it has no taste. No flavour. Only flat water. But when you go to the south and has the privilege to taste watermelons that grown up under the sun, you realise that everything else was a fake reality. A grotesque picture of what it really had to be. This is life. One day you realise that your whole daily-life has no flavour. And you try to travel to find your way. Your destiny. And find yourself. Like if you were prisoner of your own life.

And one day you leave. Because you have no other choice. And you flee. You don't know where. But you run. No look back. No second glance. Like if you were your own enemy. And maybe by fleeing you can escape yourself. This is you. As you mother said, you were escaping your reality. Like if traveling could help you to forget your loneliness. No real friends to hang out with on Saturday night. No girlfriend to invite to the restaurant. No children will. Like a wolf. Alone in the darkness. The life's darkness.

But there is no way you can ever admit it. You can't stop saying that you are here to work. But hey man. Open your eyes. It has been a long time since your travels were not only a work obligation. One day you'll accept it and deal with it. You're fleeing the adulthood. I'm fine. You're lucky I'm not cardiac. And you laughed. Because it's good to laugh. That's right. You may have been a philosopher in another life, right ? And you smiled. Because it's good to smile. And this girl is like a little sun in your life's darkness. Like if she can't consider life as a serious thing. Maybe it was what you needed to. Hum... what a question. I would have say that it was a good idea. and you followed her. Maybe there was something nice to see some miles away. Fleeing the monster. Running away.

Chad. That was a good thing that she could not remember your name. Then you coud ask her with no shame. You ? One single word for an interseting question. You joined in Ocean City right ? You asked, a large smile on your lips.

Date d'inscription : 12/06/2017

sometimes you felt cold. not because the wind blew, not because there was snow in your shoes, not because the sun didn't shine on you, but because you didn't feel happy enough. you had always thought you were some kind of fireless dragon. a dry throat. a cup of white flour. you didn't get to be what you wanted to be, so you played with life. you covered it in glitter and sparks. you threw it in the air and didn't bother catching it when it fell back. « a philosopher? » your head pops up from the bush you were exploring. there were raspberries in it. « that's flipping awesome! so i'm like... socrate? and if i'm socrate, that means you're platon! » you jump away from the bush, berries in your hands and offer some at platon. you smile at him, popping one in your mouth. « let me just say we make the greatest team ever »

a part of you seems to forget everything else for a moment. you smile like a child, lost in your own world, lost with another child, another soul. a blue soul that speaks its name. you look at platon, nod with a serious expression, and continue walking on the tree trunk you just climbed on. « nice to meet you chad-platon, i'm joan-socrate, raspberry collector and philosopher of a distant land » it seems as though you're not a really good actor. your serious face falls and you laugh loudly, almost falling from the log you were standing on.

sometimes you felt cold. but that was just sometimes, and now you felt warm, glowing with an eternal fire. you were able to breathe like a real dragon, you were a little sun in a little body. constellations were falling from your hair, down your spine, into your eyes. you wanted the blue soul that accompanied you to feel that, too. « that's correct. i live not far from the city, i wanted to run away from the monster that lives under my bed » you shrug, looking down at the ring hanging from your necklace. you suddenly want to remove it, to get away from whatever it still meant. « can you help me remove my necklace? » your hands are still full of raspberries. you turn around, looking apologetically at chad, a small smile drawn on your lips.

» Chad winter
» Chad - insertion d'un titre
» Un vent d'émotions. ▬ Reyna & Chad.
» À la lumière des étoiles (Chad et Joséphine)
» dans la chaleur des cendres - Dee